Wedding plans
I hadn't posted anything about Sara's and my engagement because I wanted to be able to tell everyone in person first. I've mostly done that now, and if I haven't told you in person, well, sorry.
We got engaged back in November, actually on my birthday. I asked her to be my birthday present, which I thought was better than asking on Christmas or Valentine's Day, and only slightly more cheesy.
Ever since then, the wedding plans have been the 400lb gorilla in the room that no one wants to confront. We talked about it a little, but with very different ideas of we each want we hadn't made much forward progress.
Sara wants a big church wedding (preferably in the Saint Paul Cathedral) to make her parents happy. I want something small and informal, preferably a destination wedding, because I detest pomp and circumstance and don't really like being the center of attention. Not being a practicing Catholic makes me an unlikely candidate for the Cathedral too, but I figured I would jump through whatever hoops they would require to get back in their good graces in time for a big wedding.
We booked a local mansion, Cedarhurst, that does outdoor weddings and receptions and thought we were well on our way, but the realization of the expense of the whole undertaking kept weighing on me, though I tried not to show it. I know that Sara was concerned about it as well, and she tried to calm my fears by saying that her parents would pay for some of the wedding.
A week after putting our deposit down at Cedarhurst we had a long talk about what we each wanted from the wedding, what our parents might want, and what we were willing to settle for. In the end, we decided that a small destination wedding was the way to go, both in terms of cost, and in terms of a ceremony that we both could live with. Hopefully her parents will understand and won't hold it against me.
So, our Oct. 14th wedding is off (which is good because it wasn't looking like we were going to get the Cathedral -- it's a solemnity day and they might not be able to have a wedding that day anyway) and we're now going to be planning the wedding I've always dreamed of -- something informal on a beach in the tropics. Maybe I'll even get a steel drum to play...
We got engaged back in November, actually on my birthday. I asked her to be my birthday present, which I thought was better than asking on Christmas or Valentine's Day, and only slightly more cheesy.
Ever since then, the wedding plans have been the 400lb gorilla in the room that no one wants to confront. We talked about it a little, but with very different ideas of we each want we hadn't made much forward progress.
Sara wants a big church wedding (preferably in the Saint Paul Cathedral) to make her parents happy. I want something small and informal, preferably a destination wedding, because I detest pomp and circumstance and don't really like being the center of attention. Not being a practicing Catholic makes me an unlikely candidate for the Cathedral too, but I figured I would jump through whatever hoops they would require to get back in their good graces in time for a big wedding.
We booked a local mansion, Cedarhurst, that does outdoor weddings and receptions and thought we were well on our way, but the realization of the expense of the whole undertaking kept weighing on me, though I tried not to show it. I know that Sara was concerned about it as well, and she tried to calm my fears by saying that her parents would pay for some of the wedding.
A week after putting our deposit down at Cedarhurst we had a long talk about what we each wanted from the wedding, what our parents might want, and what we were willing to settle for. In the end, we decided that a small destination wedding was the way to go, both in terms of cost, and in terms of a ceremony that we both could live with. Hopefully her parents will understand and won't hold it against me.
So, our Oct. 14th wedding is off (which is good because it wasn't looking like we were going to get the Cathedral -- it's a solemnity day and they might not be able to have a wedding that day anyway) and we're now going to be planning the wedding I've always dreamed of -- something informal on a beach in the tropics. Maybe I'll even get a steel drum to play...
posted by Mark at 9:54 PM
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